Jokes about birthdays

"When's your birthday?"
"July 23."
"What year?"
"Every year!"

What is your favourite type of present?
Another present!

What did one candle say to the other?
"Don't birthdays burn you up?"

Where do you find a birthday present for a cat?
In a cat-alogue!

Jokes about vampires

Why does Dracula have no friends ?

Because he's a pain in the neck !

What's a vampire's favourite sport ?

Batminton !

How does a vampire like his food served ?

In bite sized pieces !

What do vampires have at eleven o'clock every day ?

A coffin break !

What happened to the mad vampire ?

He went a little batty !

Knock knock jokes

Knock Knock
Who's there !
Alva !
Alva who ?
Alva heart !

Knock Knock
Who's there !
Amazon !
Amazon who ?
Amazon of a bishop. What's your father do ?

Knock Knock
Who's there ?
U-2 !U-2 who ?
U-2 can buy a brand-new car for only $199 a month !

Knock Knock
Who's there !
Lass !Lass who ?
That's what cowboys use, isn't it ?

Knock Knock
Who's there !
Leif !
Leif who ?
Leif me alone with all these questions !